With a heart of thanksgiving...

I have been wanting to do this blog post for a long time but as with anything in my life right now, besides being a mom, I just can't seem to find the time. But I do have a few blog posts in my head that I just can't seem to shake but I know they will not be as good if I had written them 3 weeks ago. Oh well, truly better late than never, right?

When I look back at the moments and days that flew by right after Maggie was born, I see glimpses of many faces and people who I am so incredibly thankful for. I know I won't remember to name every one of them, but please know, I am thankful for all of you. All of you who texted, called, prayed, posted comments on FB, brought us food and gifts, visited us in the hospital, worked on Maggie, let us stay at your houses, shared tears with us and much much more. The outpouring of our friends and family was amazing. We felt the loving arms of Christ surrounding us in a very very scary time of our lives. I get teary eyed just thinking about it.

But I would like to thank some people specifically.

First and foremost, my husband. Wow! God knew in so many ways, you were the exactly perfect one for me. I admired your strength in such scary moments. You were right there was Maggie the whole time they were helping her fight for her life. Your mom said at one point, after they had gotten her hooked up to a respirator, you placed your hand on her and were talking sweetly to her. I didn't get to see that, but what a precious image it leaves in my mind. You are an amazing dad and someday, our little girl is going to have you wrapped around her finger. She really already does, but it will only get worse! :)

Your support for me during all of this was awesome. I couldn't have done this without you and I am so truly thankful for you. You were exhausted, more tired than I have ever seen you, and yet you pushed on and watched over our little Maggie. You kept on top of all the medical procedures and medications happening to her. You advocated with the nurses and doctors in ways I couldn't. You were strong. You also made sure I was taken care of and had my friends and family around when I needed them most. You sacrificed so much and spent every ounce of energy in your body on Maggie, Porter and I.

To see your face light up when Porter would come to visit was sweet. We missed our little guy, but you gave him 100% when he was around even as tired and exhausted as you were. Again, I say, you are an amazing dad. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect spouse and partner to travel life together with. Thank you!

I have a huge thanks to give to my sister, my friend. Christy is AMAZING! She was with me the entire time during labor and delivery and slept so little as well but she was right there by my side helping and advocating for me as well. Words don't do justice for all that she did for us. My sister is 5 years younger than I am and we have grown super close. Growing up, she was my arch nemesis and all she wanted to do was hang out with me and tag along. Well, as a 13 year old, your 8 year old sister is not cool. Well, time changes things and we became best of friends and have been super close ever since. Over the last 7 years we have lived far enough away from each other that it was either a dedicated 5 hour drive or involved buying a plane ticket. Needless to say, now that she lives in Corvallis, we have been hanging out a lot again. So the day I went in to labor, she packed an overnight bag and came to be with us.

The other thing about my sister is she is a nurse practitioner, smarty pants! Her husband is also a doctor so they are very medically minded. We like to ask them questions and run things by them and they like to offer their medical advice and knowledge. It is pretty cool. So in the early morning hours when we made the trek to the hospital to have Miss Maggie, Christy joined us for what she had no idea was going to be the ride of all of our lives! Christy was a trooper and would do anything for me. She got me water, held the barf bag when AJ couldn't, got me cold towels and would rub my neck if I was in pain. She was going off so little sleep but hung in there.

Shortly after Maggie was born, she texted Lori, Jana and Jen to pray as Maggie was unstable and stood by my side while they worked on her and tried as best she could to encourage me that all we were waiting for was Maggie to cry. She prayed, she cried, she comforted but she knew the gravity of it all and never once portrayed that to me. Apparently, once they got Maggie a little stable, she went out to tell Jana, Lori and Jen what was going on and cried. She was so strong in front of me so I wouldn't be so scared. Wow. I can't even imagine what that was like for her. She is in the medical field and knows so much and I am sure there were a million things going through her brain. Thank you, Christy, for protecting me and watching over so many things during that whole process.

Both Christy and Tobin were a huge asset to us at Dornbecker's once Maggie was transported as they would help interpret things and give us the run down in more layman's terms. Christy also was to go to work on Monday (Maggie was born on Sunday night and Christy drove home around 4am Monday morning). Upon arrival at work and asked how it all went with her sister and her baby, she broke down and was completely emotionally exhausted. She went home and slept and then her and Tobin drove back to Portland as Tobin was to take a test the following day. Christy took the rest of the week off to be with us before they then left for Spokane to visit some other friends who recently had their second baby. It was a whirlwind week for them but they sacrificed things to be with us and support us. Christy was able to be with AJ and Maggie when the took out her breathing tube and watch her breath fully on her own. And both Tobin and Christy visited Maggie on the way to the airport at 4am and got to see her start the warming process.

I couldn't have done it without my amazing sister and her encouragement. She was a huge cheerleader during the pushing process. I just remember her saying, "You are doing good, Maryanne!" I shocked them all at my pushing abilities though. I pushed even when I wasn't having a contraction. Maggie was out 10 minutes after we started the pushing process. Thank you very much!

I would also like to thank both my parents and AJ's parents. In so many ways both of our parents have been very vital in this whole process. AJ's parents (Al and Lori) had agreed to watch Porter while we were in the hospital for a few days upon Maggie's arrival. Well, without missing a beat, they took Porter the entire week while we were up in Portland. They fed him, played with him, took him fun places, gave him naps and put him to bed every day! They also brought him up to see us as many days as possible and we would all go down to the cafeteria together to get dinner. It was a hard week for us all and Porter felt it but had amazing consistency with being with AJ's parents who he knows and loves very much. Lori was at the hospital when Maggie was born and just as soon as she could after Maggie had been taken out of the room, came in and prayed with me. Lori had also called a variety of people that night and had woken them up at midnight to ask them to pray for Maggie. She was amazing! She wrote emails that went out to a lot of people to keep them informed how to pray and support us. Al was sick that week but he still took time off of work to hang out with Porter and come and visit us and give us hugs and encouragement. Al also drove me all the way back up the the hospital after I had spent the night in Salem with Porter. He didn't come in and he didn't stay, he turned right back around and went back so he could help out with Porter. They were selfless and would do anything for us. It was one less thing I had to worry about, was Porter being well taken care of because I knew he was. Thank you, Al and Lori!

My parents (Jim and Glenda) live in Bend. My sister called them shortly after Maggie was born to apprise them of everything and get them praying. They stayed in contact with her and contacted all their co-workers, family and friends in Bend and asked them to join us in prayer for our daughter. They sent emails and communicated with Christy and determined it would be best for them to come and visit us for the day on Tuesday. They weren't sure if they would get to visit Maggie but wanted us to know they loved us and were there for us. They got up Tuesday morning and drove over the mountains and hung out with us for a few hours and did get to see Maggie and pray over her and then drove home. The pass was a little iffy with snow but they knew it was important for them to come and see us. My dad is a tour guide in Washington DC and because of a training he had to be at, their time was limited. They did come back the week we got home from the hospital and stayed with us for a week. They did laundry, made dinner, picked up the house, did yard work, played with Porter and held Maggie. It was a great transition since AJ had to go back to work. They sacrificed a lot to be with us both times and for those times I am very grateful. Thank you, Mom and Dad!

As I continue to think about all who I am thankful for, Jana pops into my mind. She is AJ's sister but even before AJ and I were dating, she was my friend! She was such an amazing encourager to me in my whole pregnancy and labor that she was confident I was going to be able to have a vaginal delivery. Porter was born cesarean and I had my hopes of having a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC) but was scared. I processed this with Jana and she understood but stood firmly in the fact that our bodies are created to birth babies and I could do it. Well, the early morning we left to go in to the hospital, Jana came over to sleep at our house to be with Porter when he woke up, I just remember her encouraging me again, that I could do it! Well, lots of hours later when I pushed Miss Maggie out, I had a successful VBAC. It was amazing and Jana was right, my body did go into labor and it did dialate and it did push Maggie out. Thank you for believing in me and the potential my body had, Jana!

Jana also did a great job of texting and updating FB to keep people posted after Maggie was born. She became friends with people she has no idea who they are but wanted to be in on any progress reports that came from the hospital. She was with us for the first three days as much as she could be to support us. She has a husband and an almost 1 year old and a part time job and she sacrificed so much to support us and keep all those posted as to what was happening with our sweet baby. She also organized a way for us to have our house cleaned and meals provided for two weeks to help with our transition home and being a family of four. JJ, we are also very thankful for you and all that you did to be with Finn so your wife could be with us. Thank you for giving up your evenings to visit us and support us. Your loan of your iPad and huge external hard drive with shows for us to watch was a wonderful stress reliever. Thank you, Jana, you are an amazing friend, sister, sister in law and aunt! JJ, we love you and love watching you be a father, friend and uncle to our kids!

To my friend, Jen, who was amazing through my whole pregnancy and labor and delivery, thank you! Jen is one of my besties who I also happen to work with. She has two sweet little kids, Samuel and Emily and they are the same age difference as Porter and Maggie. So she knows what it is like to be pregnant with a 18 month old, to have 1 boy and 1 girl and and what it is like to have two kids 22 months apart. So the last few weeks of my pregnancy she was feeling sympathy pregnancy pains for me and just couldn't wait till I had Maggie so she could be off the emotional rollercoaster! On Friday, my last day of work, she was so excited I was feeling like it was going to happen any time soon and that I was possibly feeling some contractions. We kept her apprised while I was in labor and since not a whole lot was happening let her know when something did happen, she could then come. But for then, just let her know to contact AJ for any updates as my phone was out of commission. Well, funny story. She was texting the wrong number all day long and thus AJ never texted her back. Who knows who she was texting but they never responded. Finally, that evening, Jana texted Jen to see if she wanted to go to the hospital with her and Lori as Maggie was getting closer. Jen was thrilled. So she and Lori and Jana got to be in the room while I labored, had the shakes, spiked my fever. Jen got cold washcloths endlessly. She rubbed my neck and she made me laugh. I had told the 3 of them when it came time to push I just wanted it to be AJ and Christy and they were totally fine with that. So when the doctor came back and I was a 10, they stepped out so I could get this done!

As soon as it was all over and Maggie was being worked on and then whisked away, they all came in and cried with me and prayed with me and were there for me. It was one of the hardest moments of my life. I was so helpless, I couldn't be with my baby, or my husband or see her. I had no idea what was happening but Jen was there comforting me and praying with me. They would go out to see if they could find out anything and then come back to report to me. At one point, they were all out of the room and I was in the room while the nurse was cleaning up and I texted Jen and asked her to come be with me. I didn't want to be alone. She came and sat with me. Oh, what a night. The hours seemed like minutes and seconds all at the same time. Maggie was born at 11:10pm and we did not get up to Portland till 5am. Where did all those hours go?

When they decided to transport me up to OHSU as well and they had accepted me as a patient, I was going to be making my transport via ambulance. Maggie was going up via ambulance as well with what is called the PANDA team from Dornbeckers. They are a special pediatrics ambulance and AJ was going to ride up with her so I had to go on my own. Well, AJ was not going to let that happen and made sure someone was going to ride up with me so I was not on my own. Jen rode with me. She was the best! She took pictures with her phone, texted me while in the ambulance and slept on a four foot "bed" at OHSU all in the name of not wanting me to be alone. She was a trooper. And in the same sense, so was her husband and her kids for letting their mom be there for me and my family! I don't think she did sleep at all on the four foot "bed" but she did pray with me, process with me, encourage me and laugh with me. Jen, I couldn't have done all that we did without you. Your phone calls and texts the next many weeks to follow were amazing as well. You sacrificed in so many ways for me and my family and loved our sweet Maggie, thank you!

To the Rubesh's who let us stay at their house, thank you! Ken and Kathy are friends of my sister's husbands family, the Rummels and Christy and Tobin actually stayed there a couple of nights before taking off for Spokane. The Rubesh's offered their house and guest room to us as they only lived about 10 minutes away from the hospital. It was a God send. We could stay up at the hospital late and drive home, sleep, take a shower and regain some normalcy before heading back up to be with Maggie. We were close by in case anything happened and could spend all day at the hospital knowing we had a place to crash close by. We also were able to do our laundry as we had only packed for a two day stay at the hospital. It was a huge blessing, thank you!

My dear friend Sarah and her husband Jonathan. Thank you for letting me stay the night at your house as well. I know I showed up really late and kept Sarah up even later, but it was so refreshing. Sarah, you are a wonderful supportive friend to me and I thank you for all your visits while we were at the hospital and the Diet Coke and pizza you brought us. That is a true friend! Amongst all the craziness of the week, seeing you was like a calm in the storm. Thank you!

A huge thanks to my brother and his wife, thank you! Shortly after my sister called and notified them of what was happening my brother was ready to jump in the car at 3am to meet us at OHSU if we needed him. He was amazing. We ended up letting him sleep as nothing was happening once we got to OHSU and we wanted some sleep as well, but on Monday they had planned to leave for Eagle Crest and hadn't packed or anything, came up to visit us and bring us lunch and be with us. Andy and Ruth left their 4 kids and came to see us and Miss Maggie. My brother brought his camera and was able to capture some sweet images of her despite all the machines and tubes she was hooked up to. Ruth also took some of me and her the first time I got to see her in the NICU. Oh, that was a hard moment and Ruth was there to hold me and hug me and be there. I cried, man I cried and she cried too and so did my cousin Sammie. But it was a sweet tender moment and they were both there for me.

Andy and Ruth went to Eagle Crest and then returned home and came back to visit us again at the hospital after Andy got off work. They again left their kids and came to have dinner with us and sit with me in the NICU and hold Maggie for a little bit. They sacrificed time with their kids and those whose stepped up to help with their kids sacrificed. They loved us and supported us and called us to make sure we were doing okay and wanted us to know they were there for us. It was amazing. Thank you, Andy and Ruth, it meant a lot to me.

Christi Kurtz. Thank you for coming up with JJ and putting up with his crazyness in the car to visit us. Your encouragement from Jesus Calling that day was amazing. I still go back to reread it as it was so apparent to our circumstances and that day. Thank you! And thank you for taking pictures of our sweet baby and being with us that evening when we first got to hold Maggie and I got to nurse her for the first time on day 5 of her life. You are a true friend and sacrificed being with your family that evening to love on ours. And thank you to your husband for letting you come to share with us our sweet Maggie!

And a huge thanks to our amazing friend and photographer, Valerie Hibler. She put her day on hold to be on call for us to be ready to take pictures of the moment we got to hold our sweet Maggie for the first time. She had a babysitter on call and gas in her car to be ready when we called. She arrived and hung out with us for about 2 hours and had dinner with us before we actually got to hold Maggie. That was huge. Thank you! She took amazing pictures and has blessed us beyond measure with memories of that night we will always have. I just went and watched it the other day again and was crying. Maggie is lucky to have had her newborn photo session with Valerie and we look forward to six months and a year and many family sessions to come. Thank you, Valerie, for devoting that day to our family. We will forever cherish those memories!

A couple more quick shout outs. Thanks to Debbie for coming in the middle of the night to be with Lori and us at Silverton Hospital. She appeared like an angel and was a comfort to Lori and to us. Thank you, ,Debbie! Thanks to Shannon for selflessly cleaning our house and making it look beautiful! Thank you to Lauren for the beautiful roses and balloons that greeted us when we got home. And thank you to each person who brought us a meal. We ate well and loved each of them. Your gift to our family that was was thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated!

Thank you to each person who visited us at the hospital. Let me see if I can remember them all. If not, please don't think I am not thankful for you. Remember it was 5 weeks ago and I am a nursing, sleepless mother of two! Thank you to: Debbie Espinoza. Sammie, Austin and Maisie Lee. Andy and Ruth Miller. Jana, JJ, Finn Avison. Al and Lori DeBacker. Sarah and Jonathan Case. Nicki Williams. Valerie Hibler. Cindy Howard. Les and Jeanne Lloyd. Jen and Jeff Henderson. Cary Wood. Christi Kurtz. Janae. Heather and Charlie and kids Mauck. Christy and Tobin Rummel.

And finally, to EVERYONE who prayed. I know we don't know who everyone is because that is just how widespread Maggie's story was. Your prayers encompassed us and blessed us and petitioned our great God on Maggie's behalf and we are eternally grateful. I will post again soon on how she is doing and the full miracle that she is. But know for now, the way each of you stepped in to intercede on our behalf was truly a blessing beyond any measure. Our God is great and our God is big and we have witnessed that time and time again. THANK YOU!

So with a heart of thanksgiving, I say, thank you, thank you.

Maryanne:)